Is your father a C+?

If you were asked to grade your father, would you give him an A, B or C?

Sometime ago, a magazine did a survey on how Singaporean kids view their parents. Of those who took part in the survey, they gave Singaporean fathers an average grade of C+.

That is such a low grade, I would say. But, the grade was not given without some truth in it.

The other day, a friend told me a story about this father of two.

He is a middle aged man who is a good boss. He teaches young employees with patience at work and talks to them like a caring father after work. A lot of people admire him and even said his children are a fortunate lot.

Because of his long working hours, he usually got back home quite late, after his wife and children have finished their dinner. Back at home, while the kids were busy doing homework or using the computer, he watched the news on television and read the newspapers, like many other fathers do.

However, he makes it a point to talk to the kids everyday. That is a good thing, but, the things that he said were always the same.

“Have you finished your homework?”
“Why are you always playing computer games?”
“It’s late, quick go to bed.”

He did “try” to talk to the children, but there is simply nothing he could say to them, except the monotonous words he repeated day after day.

It is no wonder why fathers were given a C+ grade. What else do they expect?

Sometimes, it is quite saddening that some parents have nothing to say to their children, or even feel awkward talking to them.

But, while Singaporean fathers are given a C+ grade, I think most Singaporean children deserve the same grade too.

Communication is a two-way business. While children may complain that their parents do not understand them, how much do they understand of their parents?

When we are much younger, we might take it for granted that our parents should take the initiative to ask us about school and about our friends. But sometimes, when they ask, we would simply tell them not to ask so much, or simply reply, “Aiyah, you do not understand lah,” to “dismiss” them.

Ask yourself, how many times have you asked your parents whether they had a good day at work and how are their colleagues?

Once? Twice? Or none?

Maybe the magazine should do a survey on how Singaporean parents grade their kids. Let’s hope we can get at least a C.