Give up your seat

Do you voluntarily give up your seat to someone who needs it more than you do?

I was on the MRT today when there was a dispute between an old man and a young couple. It created quite a stir on the train and three MRT attendants came up to settle the row.

I did not witness the commotion (as it happened before I boarded the train) but from what I observed and heard, this was what happened.

The young couple, in their 20s, was sitting down on the two-seater seats. There was a sign above the seats that says, “Give up your seat to someone who needs it more than you do”, with illustrations of pregnant women and the elderly.

An old man in his 70s, with his wife, were both carrying big plastic bags. He went over to the couple and said, “Excuse me”, in a tone that meant he wanted the young couple to give up their seats to them.

There was probably some heated arugment, some scuffle and perhaps some body contact, because the next moment, the lady was crying and ranting that the old man was “rude”, and that she was going to “call the police”.

The old man was very angry and kept shouting in the train, and the lady got very worked up. Fortunately, at that time, the MRT attendants boarded the train and managed to calm them down, and the police was not brought in. However, both parties refused to alight and board another train, and for the next twenty minutes or so, they sat right across one another awkwardly.

The old man felt that he was wrongly accused and complained, “I said ‘Excuse me’, so why did she say I am rude? There was a sign above the seat. How can they bully the old?” The lady was silent, but she sobbed uncontrollably, with her boyfriend next to her comforting her.

As a bystander, I feel that the old man should not take it for granted that others should give up their seats to him. Although the seats did have a sign above, but it serves to “encourage” people to give up their seats to the elderly, and not to “enforce a rule”.

On the other hand, if the young couple has noticed the old couple, they should have taken the initiative and be considerate enough to offer their seats. Why wait till an old man has to ask for the seats?

I must admit that I have seen some elderly who are difficult and who make unreasonable demands on others. Some take it for granted that because they are old, others have to give in to them. We should not condone such behaviour, but let us embrace the elderly with an open heart. If they have not gone overboard, let us bear with them, be considerate towards them, and show them some respect.

Perhaps in this case, if the old man had asked for the seats politely, and the young couple had readily offered their seats, such unhappiness and ugly scenes could be avoided.

After all, a little courtesy goes a long way.